I doubt that an incident light meter will get you there. Though from a photography perspective the more you understand light the better.
The simplest, most basic thing to understand towards your desired end is the old f16 rule. I suspect if you've been doing some reading that you've run across it. That's a good basis from which to base the intuitive "metering" that you seek. The f16 rule is based on clear skies in middle latitude regions. If the scene contains white/bright highlights the rule is modified to f22 as the basis. On the other hand if you're trying to keep shadow detail, f11. Slightly filtered overcast with still distinct shadows, f11. Overcast with indistinct shadows makes the basis f8. Heavy enough overcast for no shadow, f5.6.
Regarding the math, you can simply count stops from the base f16 rule on your fingers. I do it that way all the time and I have above average math skills. If you want different settings than the basic f16 and ss at 1/ISO, you simply step ss and aperture in opposite directions by equal amounts.
I shoot in manual mode 99 percent of the time and the old f16 rule (modified for conditions) is where I start every lighting decision. Then I fire a test shot or two, check the histogram, and adjust. I do still use the light meter in the camera but just as a quick reference to see if I'm "between the ditches".
I do have to retract what I said in my first post. Based on your further comments it sounds like you have a desire to understand lighting and exposure in some detail. To achieve that you really should start understanding light metering and how to use a histogram. The method you're using is a crutch and is fine if you just want to successfully take the occasional snap shot. But if you want to really understand photography, you need to understand light and how to quantify it in order to translate it to camera settings. Quantifying it doesn't have to mathematical, it can be intuitive. But you need to develop that understanding rather than relying completely on electronics. After all, the electronics will change if/when you change equipment.