Peter,
I'm using a D7000 with a SB700 speadlight I have pulled my hair out over the same issue. Nikon sells a very sophisticated piece of equipment called the Nikon SG-3IR IR Pane...
Yes sounds fancy doesn't it? You can get this amazing piece of technology made from Nikon for an amazing $12!!!
Okay I will drop the smug sarcasm...
But really it is a piece of plastic that drops down over the pop up flash. It says that this device lets IR light go through it so not to blind the model, with the pre flashes. (My problem was the flash pre fires still seemed to appear in the shot, this was problematic for low key shots & smoke photography where I did not want any of the background getting lit.)
here is the link
HERE
Ever Nikon owner that doesnt own the SU-800 Wireless Speedlight should have one of these.
I hope this helps.