Yes that is a lot better.
I always think of flower photographs as being portraits which need just as much care as doing a formal portrait of a person.
The B&W could work but I think you need to create a little bit more contrast. It is a fairly complex bit of editing to get everything looking perfect; a lot more effort is required than just clicking the 'create monochrome' button. Working on individual colour channels can produce some excellent results - eventually.
Sometimes I use the Auto setting to point me in the right direction then do my own editing tweaks based on that starting point.